The M Word

Sometimes, we JUST want to be heard!

How many times, when we come home tired and feeling frustrated, do we tell our partner about the problem, only to be infuriated by their immediate offerings of suggestions of things we can do to make a situation better?   Aaaargh!  I do not want you to FIX it;  I just want to vent!  Let me explain…  Let me whine a little.  Let me complain for a bit.  Let me convey to you all of the ways that I am feeling about this situation.  I am actually aware that this may feel like a not-very-useful exercise to you and may in turn make you frustrated with me, but please just listen for a little bit.  Actually, if you can do a little mirroring and empathizing, that would be better still!  Then it will be over.  Really!

We often characterize this scenario as a female-male dynamic, but even in our office of all women at Morpheus, we find ourselves on both sides of the vent/listen table.  So, sometimes we have to use the code words: “It’s Not About the Nail…”  If you have never watched it, I promise, this will be worth 1:40 minutes of your life: Click Here.  Laugh and adopt the code words, even if you only say them to yourself!

— Dr. C

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